The car was packed. You and your friends were singing loudly, obviously having a wonderful time. We were stopped at a red light when your eyes met mine.
I swear I didn’t realize I was staring…your happiness drew me in- I was stuck thinking about the last time I felt like that. Back before my body and soul became this exhausted. Before the weight of grief started filling every breath I take.
You snapped me back in to the present with one simple, yet oh so needed gift- “You’re beautiful!”
I’m not quite to the point where there are ‘good’ days yet, but there are glimmers of hope in better days to come- and you, my dear, are one of them.
You see, what you had no idea of knowing is we were on our way to the cemetery. This was one of the two times a week we make the ‘trek’ out there to see our girls. I still feel out of place venturing in to public, and this is about all I’ve mustered up the ‘courage’ to go do so far.
I’ve kept to myself because this pain seeps from my pores. Surely my dark cloud is so large that I’m spreading it as I go- covering my tracks behind me with the devastation of our current storm.
Thank you for helping me understand that just because I’m in a dark time doesn’t mean I don’t still carry light within me. Thank you for seeing something in me I haven’t seen in myself for a long time. That no matter how ugly I feel- my beauty is, and always will be.
Most of all, thank you for brining a smile to this Momma’s face- you, sweet girl, are just as beautiful.